I spoke briefly of fear being imagined in this blog post and mentioned some tactics I use to overcome my own fears. Before I get into it, have you recognized and acknowledge where you’re own imagined thoughts about fear are holding you back? That really needs to happen before applying these tips. Are you ready? Good.
1. Repeat Positive Affirmations, Daily
You’re probably not aware that you’ve been saying affirmations your entire life. If you struggle with self-worth, you are probably affirming negative statements. After awhile, you begin to believe the negativity. For example, the fear-voice says, “You’re not good enough for that. You don’t deserve this thing you want.” That fear voice in your head can be masked and even eliminated with the power of saying positive affirmations. A positive affirmation reinforces, “I deserve abundance, love, recognition, admiration, success. I am worthy and capable!” Imagine if you had been saying positive words of encouragement to yourself for years. Your confidence would be spiking through the roof! Start today. Even if saying the statements creates inner conflict at first, say it anyway. Repeat the affirmations with gusto and enthusiasm. Over time, the questions of doubt and worry will fade and you will transform into a powerfully positive being.
Here are some positive affirmations offered by MyDreamsMatter.com:
2. Ask For Support From Friends & Family
Don’t be shy about asking for help. It is not a sign of weakness. In fact, sharing vulnerability with others demonstrates strength. How will anyone ever know that you need support or encouragement if fears are kept hidden? Explain to your friends and family what it is you’re struggling with. Be open and available. Sometimes people won’t know what it is you need to hear. Don’t be shy about describing the words, phrases, and gestures that would be helpful for your success. You will discover that your friends and family want you to succeed. And, people naturally want to help others. You’ll feel better knowing you’re surrounded by love. Your friends and family will feel a sense of community by helping you. It’s a win-win situation.
3. Seek Inspiration & Mentorship From Other Successful People
No matter how unconventional your dream is, I promise that someone, somewhere is already successfully doing it. Find that source of inspiration and study their path in order to soak up experience points without actually having to go through some of the tougher battles. If you approach your mentors with envious thoughts of “How come they got the goods and I don’t?” you’re closing yourself off to the opportunity to learn from them. Instead, bask in knowing that because they are doing that thing you dream of, that is proof that it is possible! The next step to this tip is to reach out to your mentor and ask to have a conversation about your hopes and fears. As I mentioned in Tip #2, people naturally want to help others. One day, you’ll be the mentor, relieving someone else’s worries (but only if you ignore those imagined fears!). I talk about this in greater detail in my book, “Live Life For A Living“. Download the PDF here:
4. Be Present & Self-Aware
No matter how confident you become in your gifts and talents, there will be curve balls and moments of questioning. That’s the journey of life. The good news is that you don’t have to let these moment affect your intentions. Developing self-awareness is key. The moment that your fear-voice approaches, recognize it. Cancel it out with a positive affirmation. If that’s too difficult, simply take a deep breath and smile. It’s amazing how powerful a smile can be. A smile can eradicate the heaviest sadness. Think that you can’t force a smile? Think of a fond memory; a person you love; pull up a silly picture of your favorite animal; imagine being spoiled like a king or queen.
5. Get To Know Your Goal
As I’ve mentioned, a fear is simply an imagined thought. It may be “real” in the sense that there is a possibility of coming true. A possibility does not mean that it is for certain and these tips are here to help make sure that fear cannot manifest. Understanding your goal is important so that you can prepare yourself. Before public speaking, for example, it helps to practice in front of a mirror or an imaginary audience. Gather a few of your friends or family and ask them to sit through your nervousness until you become comfortable standing up in front of people. Familiarizing yourself with the goal on an imaginary level first, develops confidence so that when you’re there in the real moment your thought is, “I know what I’m doing, I’ve done this a thousand times!” Play the event in your mind again and again. Create your own imaginary thoughts that are centered on the beauty of this thing that you think is scary. Focus on the joy you will feel after you overcome fear. Imagine the audience clapping. Visualize an influential person approaching you to congratulate you on your speech.
Our egos create fear. The ego is afraid of growth and change. It gets very comfortable with routine and the safety that that brings. Once you’re aware of this notion, you will be able to re-interpret the fear-voice as an amazingly incredible opportunity for growth and expansion. Instead of allowing fear to stop you in your tracks, you will propel yourself forward with the confidence of knowing that something fantastically unimaginable is about to change your life – for the better!